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so yeah... i had my first "anal experience" the the other night. i was really surprised at how good it felt.there really wasnt that much pain at all. if anyone wants to ask me more about it, just go ahead and reply or email me. im ready to go another round about right now. hmmmm.....
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Comments: 6 .:*stars mended*:. - .:*mend my stars*:..
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Wednesday, March 27th, 2002
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1 - 14 gauge barbell ((with both balls)) - surgical steel~8$
2 - 4 gauge plugs ((3 O rings-missing one)) - clear acrylic plugs with black O rings~5$ each
2 - 12 gauge captive hoops ((no balls)) - surgical steel hoops~8$ each
if youre interested just email me at: goddampixiegeek@ifuckstuffedanimals.com and i will send you a picture if you want one and my mailing address for payment. i'll take money order, cash, or personal check.
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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Tuesday, March 26th, 2002
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1 - 8 gauge captive hoop ((with ball))-surgical steel~8$ ((pending, but may still be taken))
2 - 14 gauge barbell ((with both balls and one is made for the tongue)) - surgical steel~8$ each
1 - 14 gauge barbell ((with both balls)) - surgical steel bar with UV acrylic purple and pink balls~10$
2 - 4 gauge plugs ((3 O rings-missing one)) - clear acrylic plugs with black O rings~5$ each
1 - 14 gauge captive hoop ((with ball)) - surgical steel hoop with clear and blue acrylic ball ~8$ ((pending, but still may be taken))
2 - 8 gauge plugs - well they are really steel tunnels and the ends screw on so no O rings are required~6$ each
2 - 12 gauge captive hoops ((no balls)) - surgical steel hoops~8$ each
if youre interested just email me at: goddampixiegeek@ifuckstuffedanimals.com and i will send you a picture if you want one and my mailing address for payment. i'll take money order, cash, or personal check.
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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Saturday, January 26th, 2002
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Thursday, January 10th, 2002
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well i just wanted to put the remainder of the memories i have... today was her funeral. i couldnt make myself go. the wake was bad enough. it numbed me and i couldnt speak.. couldnt move.. i dont know.. it was just weird for the longest time. i wanted to cry but i couldnt. too many people. too much...... everything.
daia and trini used to always come over and daia would run into the kitchen and go through evrything to look for a cake or something. we never had any. i wouldve given her all of it if we did.
last year we had trig together. i helped her all the time. we would sit there and make fun of manning. some days her, keith, and i would eat brownies.. especially on katie's birthday. and we'd just talk and talk about everything. she just sat right behind me. i gave her most of my food b/c she was hungry and i wasnt. the most memorable thing in that class is when daia knew that there was no way she was going to pass it but she showed up for the exam but instead of taking it she put: "today is a sad day" on her paper and went to sleep.
i woke her up all the time in english b/c she'd sleep so long. i think it was perhaps the only time she would sleep.
she asked me to move in with her b/c she was going to move out b/c her mom told her to leave and her mom and her would always fight. i would've done it too but then she told me that her mom wouldnt let her. we could've both gotten away. and it just makes you think. but i know her mom had to really love her... especially after seeing her yesterday.
and i think thats it. if theres more.. i wont post them. i said my goodbyes. and its not really her death that bothers me.. its the fact that shes just not around. i'm not scared of death.. i'm scared of being alone and not having that person around anymore. its just strange.. so strange. i still dont think it all has clicked yet. i dont know what i'm waiting for.. maybe i just dont want to feel it b/c shes the closest person to me that has left. its just weird and scary..... idont know whether to get closer to evryone or further away...
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Comments: 3 .:*stars mended*:. - .:*mend my stars*:..
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Wednesday, January 9th, 2002
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when daia wouldnt do her work she'd ask me for evrything that she needed and she would come over and i would give it to her b/c i would forget to give it to her.
i'd ask her evryday for about 2 months for trini's address but she would always forget so she would ask me to remind her and i would forget to remind her.
the pictures of her, katie, and trini in NY that took her forever to let me see and then she gave me some to put in the yearbook.
the beautiful pictures of her and her sister as fairies.
her creativity in general.......
and thats just some more that i just thought of and wanted to share.
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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for days.. all i've wanted to do was write down my memories of her. but i couldnt. i didnt want to think about her but i did. i didnt want to talk about her b/c i just couldnt.. still cant. but i wanna put something down b/c all i've wanted to do is scream: i miss daia!!! but just havent b/c i havent been able to. i dont see it solving anything even if i did. the only thing i have been able to do is... just think and stare out a window or at a cd player w/ moving pictures. but here are some memories:
i think i met daia in 7th or 8th grade. i didnt like her then ((most pepl didnt)) and she didnt like me either. in 8th grade... we both dated the same guy and now i wonder if he remembers who she is. neither of us liked to admit it anyways. in 9th grade.. she totally changed. i remember pepl going: look.. thats daia!! and i was like: what?!? no way. she got a nice lil replacement for the teeth that she lost. dyed her hair blond. stood up straight. and got really cute clothes. i'm not sure when i started being friends w/ her. or even talk to her. it probably was in 10th grade when i became friends w/ trini. i didnt really see them much out of skool for a bit. and i dont really have an order for the rest of these memories.
one nite i went for a walk on the beach w/ my ex boyfriend aaron and daia, trini, katie, chelsea, and ashley were out there. they had no idea it was me and, of course, werent sober :o).
for omost 3 months i would go over to trinis all the time.. daia and chelsea were always there.. and we'd do what we did. like smoke and then go to tato nut.. drive around the neighborhood, the beach.. etc etc. or just jump around and roll around on the 2 beds that were in trini's old room.
smoked out once w/ trini, chelsea, and daia before skool. when daia and i got out of chemistry we talked about how we had a substitute and how paranoid we were b/c they seemed to hover around us the whole time. then we got into our english class w/ harrison and we giggled and sat half asleep and omost sleeping the whole time.
she was in a debate for creation club. chelsea, trini, and i watched her and complimented her afterwards b/c she was the only one who knew what she was saying.
stopping by ronnie's house and then going to daia's. listened to her lil music and playing w/ her mini mp3 player and looking at her million purses that would go w/ anything.
her 16th birthday party. where evryone just about cried but still had fun. drew was a total ass to her that nite and trini, katie, and i comforted her and told her how beautiful she was and that we loved her. then her losing her shirt and crying about it b/c she was a bit drunk :o).
she got me a job at salvettis. she trained me and all that stuff. she was soo much fun to work w/ and everyone loved her. all energetic and stuff. :o). especialy when she wore the nice lil outfit w/ the panty hose shirt and a black shirt that i also have except she tore the sleeves off of it... and a purple "fairy" skirt. and how she liked that one guy ((cant remember his name)) and he had beautiful eyes.
then the 1st day of skool.. we talked.. then i saw her before my english class and we discovered that we had the same class. we walked there together and tried to sit near each other but it was impossible. we talked as much as we could in that class. but she was usually sleeping. and i'd talk to her whenever i saw her outside of class. and she'd come into class after skipping lunch and be out of it and would sit there eating sugar from tato nut then write me messages on the packets. then we'd sit and eat sugar together and just talk and laugh.
then when i was over at jasons.. we called her and she teased me on the phone... and i laughed.
oh and cant forget the beautiful fairy outfit she made for halloween.
and how she'd tell me that she hasnt been sleeping and worked her butt off on different projects. and how derek worried about her. and then i'd tell her that i worry about her.
i guess i have the same problem as ben. daia and i were once purty close.. then a lil bit of a fading out.. then starting to get close again............ but now........ i dont know if i regret anything more than not telling her that i loved her and that she was beautiful. even though i always said: hey beautiful... i'm not sure if she knew i meant it. b/c i know that most of the reason why i couldnt hang out w/ her was because of jealousy. she was so beautiful and attracted evryone in some way. so dammit..i miss her.... and i must finish getting ready for her wake :o(. and i cant say goodbye yet.. b/c i still cant believe shes gone and i'm not sure when i will............
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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Sunday, January 6th, 2002
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i dont know what to say. evryone has said stuff. what do i say?? i dont know if people even knew that i was friends w/ her except for a few pepl. oh well. all i know is that i worried my ass off about her and...................
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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Friday, January 4th, 2002
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Life is fairly pointless to for me. It's a constant cycle of getting captured by Bowser, getting rescued by men who lust after me either due to my looks or wealth, and baking cakes. Any involvement I have in a game is fairly limited. I reinforce the bad stereotype that women are helpless beings. I am made of sugar and spice and everything nice, yet incapable of inteligent thought. Such is the life of Peach.
What Super Mario Bros character are you?
anyone who hates me will appreciate this
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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this article that i stole from ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) victoriansquid really upsets me. not that i'm a big fan of using the word vagina but b/c of the fact of what the mayor of NY state says at the end of it. i think the vagina monologues has some use and should be publicized. we still have to fight for womens rights and such today... and fight to be feminine. b/c no matter how much pepl like to say that women have equal right now....... it isnt true. i'll eventually display my "feminist" article.
Mayor nixes banner ad for controversial play
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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Thursday, January 3rd, 2002
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stolen from ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) spunksters:
Punk rock love is fucking behind the dumpster down the street from the show. Fucking in the shower at the Hotel Carlton. Making out in the recycle bin. Looking at her tattoos while she's asleep. Taking showers together. Playing checkers with cigarette butts. Watching her band play. Dumpstering veggies together and then going back to her place and cooking up a feast. Knowing the same parts of the same songs. Both of you having the same ex-girlfriend.
Punk rock love is having to tie her shoes for her cuz she's too drunk. Kissing under the overpass. Her sending you her whole diary to read. Her giving you ten rolls of duct tape for your birthday. Her beating up skinheads. Going to the prom on her motorcycle and checking in the helmets at the coatcheck. Getting astonished stares from all the jocks who thought you were gay, now they feel dumb cuz you're with an older punk rock bombshell and they're with their friend's little sister.
Punk rock love is meeting her outside the club and her saying come home with me or I'm gonna kick your fuckin ass. Going home with her and she almost kicks your ass anyway. Sharing hairdye. Riding double on a bike. Being loud and not caring. Sneaky eyes and sleeveless t-shirts. The sun coming up and you realizing that there's other people on the beach. A good sleazy one week stand. Still being friends afterwards, most of the time.
Punk rock love is her sneaking out in the middle of the night to meet you in the park. Running your fingers over her spikey hair. Her chewing on a flower and you having to call poison control when her tongue swells up. Bringing her to the laundromat for a date. Sharing a sleeping bag and waking up freezing in the middle of the night and her, bleary eyed, trying to heat it up with a blowdrier. Social Unrest playing "Ever Fallen in Love?" at the gig you're both at the night after she dumps you hard. Starting smoking again after that night.
Punk rock love is her drawing on you. Her sleeping on your back. Her being mad at you for being such a jerk. Her thinking it's cool that you stink and your hair stands up by itself. Her having weird roommates who worship eggs. You waiting in the doorway for hours hoping she might pass by. Even in the snow. Her singing along with Descendents records over the air on her late night radio show. Her picture on the front page of the morning paper, getting arrested. Her borrowing your favorite black hat and never giving it back. Punk rock love is finding a girl who drinks as much coffee as you do. Going into the cafe where she works and she looks up and smiles and doesn't notice as she tips over a pile of 50 dishes. They hit the floor one by one and when it's all done everyone in the cafe applauds and you both turn beet red.
Punk rock love is both of you doing fanzines. Years later her teaching English to college freshmen, you still doing fanzines. Her wearing glasses through her eyes are fine, using crutches though her legs are fine, and talking with a fake speech impediment. You just thinking it's rad girl style, until later when someone brings up the concept of self-imposed handicaps.
Punk rock love is getting your first kiss and almost losing your virginity at the same time, meanwhile you're trying not to wake up the other person sleeping in the same bed. Groping in the bushes by the freeway and later you realize that all the passing cars could see you. Exploring the wasteland together. Holding hands out on the fire escape. Lying in the grass in her backyard. Lying on the astroturf in her bedroom. Drinking tequila on her porch, on your birthday. Riding on her motorcylce early in the cold morning and you're holding on tight and steam is rising off of the river and you're thinking how she is maybe even better than the Ramones.
Punk rock love is both being broke. Love letters. Finding out she sang "Stay Free" at her high school talent show. Finding out she's a little crazier than you thought when you finally get her in bed. Her boyfriend getting mad. Walking around with her and her nephew and everyone giving you dirty looks cuz they think he's your kid. Walking around with her and being happy and proud. Being sad together. Being sad by yourself. Missing her.
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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im super glad that i chose to graduate early. evryone is complaining about having to go to skool tomorrow and im just like: hmmm.. what can i waste my time doing for the next few months. its soooooooooooooo great!!!!
i definitely want a job. a nice job though. i dont care about the amount of money i make if its a good job.
i have about 6 months until i move to mobile. at least i have that much of the future figured out. what to do at the present?? no clue!!! it will all come together i think.
the day time is going to be lonely. jason ((tearystary)) will be at skool and at work. all of my friends will be at skool. i need to make more friends. pepl who arent in skool no mo. i need my license so i can drive my beautiful car. i guess i should talk to my mommy about it, huh??
i just had fun washing the dishes. woohoooooooo!!! well i had to do something. what else can i clean??? there must be something. i just feeling like cleaning today for some reason. i made pink lemonade too. something to keep me busy.
well ill go watch the messenger and think. i wish i had my notebooks so i could write. i'm sure i could think up some words to jot down.
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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time and all that good stuff messes me up real badly. i mean.. all your life your told... "it takes time," "its too early," etc etc. and for some reason.. i believe it sometimes. like... how you cant feel a certain way for a person b/c "you havent known them long enough." and so i question how i'm feeling a lot... and believe that it isnt possible to feel a certain way just b/c of the whole time thing. but i think there are other ways to know a person than anyone ever tells you. everyone wants everything to be so concrete and have stupid guidelines.. and nothing close to supernatural or unexplainable or something or another ((i cant remember the word that i meant to place here)). i think sometimes.. you can know a person w/o them speaking.. without looking at them... just by.. i dont know... something unexplainable. why do people want to give a time limit on love and feelings?? perhaps... sometimes.. you know how you feel b/c you never felt that way before and its a good feeling... not something that is forced or anything. it scares me to death but it is much scarier to not feel this way ever again or to lose the one i feel it for.
so there... i finally wrote that b/c i have to put it somewhere....
right now i'm watching the messenger even though it isnt that great of a movie. very sick in the beginning. god.. killing a woman just b/c she slapped him and then having sex w/ her corpse. yeeesh.
jason ((tearystar)) is off registering for college and all that stuff. i called my sister b/c i thought her and my daddy were coming down today but theyre not b/c it snowed up there. theyre coming back tomorrow. its snowing bad enuff not to travel there and its only bham. but whatever.
i still have a delimma though............. WHERE AM I GOING TO LIVE???????????????
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Comments: 6 .:*stars mended*:. - .:*mend my stars*:..
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#1:
You are Sailor Moon!
You can feel a bit overwhelmed by your duties
at times, but don't fear! This is what you were
cut out for!
You're a sensitive, caring person and a loyal,
loving friend.
You fight with the power of the moon!
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
#2:
You are Sailor Pluto!
You are mysterious, and powerful.
You are the keeper of time, and though you
posses the power to stop time... if you did, it
would kill you. Quite a responsibilty.
You're probably rather fond of garnet.
You fight with the power of death and time!
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
</font>
#3:
You are Sailor Chibi Moon!
Aren't you a cutie? You can be a bit bratty, but
when you're sweet it always makes up for
your sour side. You're spunky, and young.
You have a special bond with your mother,
and a special bond with another special someone.
You fight with the power of sweets, sugar, and love!
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
</font>
#4:
You are Sailor Venus!
You are graceful, beautiful, and
the incarnation
of love and heart.
You're athletic, and you're a good friend...
Even if you do have a tendency to be late.
You might even be famous someday!
You fight with the power of love and beauty!
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
</font>
#5:
You are Sailor Mars!
You are firey, and powerful, and you
have a bit of a quick temper.
You have special spiritual powers that
go beyond that of just being a Sailor Senshi.
You fight with fire!
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
</font>
#6:
You are Sailor Saturn!
You are are most mysterious and ellusive
of the sailors. You've gone evil, as Mistress Nine
and been resurrected. You're dark,
pale, and extremely fragile.
Your parents love you enough to give
their lives for you.
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
</font>
#7:
You are Sailor Uranus!
You're pretty, but you're also very masculine
and you like speed and power.
You have a special love for someone
out there who means the world to you.
You fight with the power of earthquakes!
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
</font>
#8:
You are Sailor Neptune!
You are beautiful, very intelligent, and
are a very talented musician.
You have a special love for someone
out there who means the world to you.
You fight with the power of the deep sea!
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
</font>
#9:
You are Sailor Jupiter!
You're tall, and you're tough, and you
won't just stand by and let somone pick
on your friends.
But, when you're not kicking butt, you're
a sweetie. You like to cook, and every boy you
see reminds you of your ex-boyfriend.
You fight with the power of lightning!
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
</font>
#10:
You are Sailor Mercury!
You are very smart, and you're good with
computers. You're sweet, and soft-spoken
and you have a very good heart.
You're not the most powerful, but you're the
brains of the operation.
You fight with the element of water!
Take the Which Sailor Are You? Quiz!
...created by Kenzie.
</font>
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Comments: .:*mend my stars*:..
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